So, the other day, I was just scrolling, you know, mindlessly through the internet. My cat was asleep on my lap, snoring like a tiny old man, and I wasn’t really in the mood for anything serious. Then, bam! An ad pops up – “Free Soulmate Tarot Reading.” Now, I’m not one for all that mystical stuff usually. My idea of fate is whether the coffee machine decides to work in the morning. But “free”? And “soulmate”? Curiosity got the better of me. I mean, what’s the harm, right?
I clicked on it. Took me to one of those websites, all purple and starry. Looked a bit like a teenager’s bedroom from the 90s. It asked me to “concentrate” and then pick three cards. No shuffling, no actual deck, just pictures of cards on the screen. Click, click, click. Easy peasy.
Then the “reading” appeared. It was pretty generic, to be honest. Stuff like:
- “Your soulmate is closer than you think.”
- “You need to be open to new experiences.”
- “Communication is key.”
Groundbreaking, I know. I reckon my grandma could have told me that, and she thinks tarot cards are just fancy playing cards. It also said something about my soulmate being “artistic” and “sensitive.” Well, that narrows it down to about half the population, doesn’t it?
It reminded me of this one time, years ago, I went on a blind date. My friend Sarah swore this guy was “perfect” for me. Artistic? Check. Sensitive? Well, he cried when the restaurant didn’t have his favorite brand of mineral water. So, sensitive, I guess. But a soulmate? Not so much. We spent the whole evening talking about his “vision” for his interpretive dance career. I just nodded and ate my pasta. Turns out, “perfect for me” meant “available and willing to listen to him talk about himself.” After that, I kinda gave up on the whole “someone else knows who’s good for me” idea.
So, this free soulmate tarot thing? It was a bit of a laugh. Took all of five minutes. Didn’t tell me anything I didn’t already suspect – that most of these online quizzes are just programmed to give you vague, positive-sounding answers. No magic involved, just algorithms.
I don’t think I’ll be finding my soulmate through a random click on the internet. But hey, it killed a few minutes while the cat was napping. And it didn’t cost me a penny, which is always a bonus. Sometimes, you just gotta try these things to remind yourself that real connections happen, you know, out in the real world. Or at least, not through a pop-up ad while you’re bored. Still, if you’ve got a spare five minutes and low expectations, why not, eh?
